I don’t even know where to begin. But I did this for the benefit of everyone who reads my blog. Instead of making one giant monstrosity of a post, I will brake it down into parts. So now I am left with figuring out how to write this. So where do I begin?
Week 1 : Weird Ass Shit
So this family asked if I could stay at their house for a week or two. It ended up being slightly longer than that. In fact I celebrated the entire Parentalia over there. Figuring I could tap into the power of the ancestors to help out. And banish what was there.
That also means I spent Valentine’s with one of the most dysfunctional families ever. A lot of weird shit happened. I am not allowed to say how I was contacted. I am not allowed to even make up names for the family members. Yes they’re that paranoid.
But I let them know I write of my experiences. And while the husband was upset (more on him later) I let him know I don’t give a fuck. He was lucky I was even there to put up with them. That is the least they could do. So he can kiss my ass.
I get the feeling that maybe they have a reason to be so paranoid after all. That family is shady as fuck. I wasn’t comfortable being there at all. They weren’t delinquents or anything like that. I wasn’t afraid of being stabbed.
But it’s hard to focus on paranormal activity, when you’re surrounded by people who aren’t truthful. So I show up at around noon. I asked where most of the spirit activity was manifesting. And when. They said at night and all over the house. So I choose to sleep on the couch even though they had a guest room.
This is the center for energy, the common ground for everyone living there. And there I made my stand. The family dog liked me. But would not stay with me. They said that was strange.
When I asked them to elaborate they wouldn’t tell me shit. Because they were testing me to see if I was for real or not. Just fyi. If you want someone to help you, don’t bullshit them. Or beat around the bush.
I have seen skeptics who need help do this to the mediums and others they hire. To “test them”. You can test my balls on a hot day in Hell. Don’t waste my fucking time. I damn near almost left.
And even now I still get the weird feeling they didn’t tell me everything. Normally I’d tell them to go fuck themselves. But they have kids ages 6 to 17. And a sweet pooch who was afraid all of the time. What could I do?
But here’s one of the ways in which not telling me the info I needed caused this to be such a lengthy fucking problem. The activity started in the master bedroom. It would have been nice to know that instead of wasting my time playing psychic catch-up. The Mom didn’t say anything to me. Hell she hadn’t said anything to anyone.
Because she assumed that it was her imagination. And didn’t want to worry anyone. But for a week before the incident I am about to talk about, she felt goosebumps in the bathroom. So did the husband.
(A testosterone filled skeptic douche bag, who felt the need to mock my faith)
The 15 yr sister was was in the bathroom making a video of her trying a dress on. It was for her friend. And explaining fashion stuff like she was an influencer. When she entered the bathroom and recorded the video, this weird black shadow that looked almost like a person crossed right in front of her. It happened on video while she was recording it live.
It wasn’t a case of looking back at video evidence and seeing it afterwards. Then the same shadow was right back in the same spot it was before. And it kept walking across her screen repeatedly over and over until the video went white and shut down. I saw the video myself. But that isn’t the strangest part.
She sent the video to her friend. But her friend showed us the video. The whole thing was in slow motion and silent. You couldn’t hear a thing this girl was saying. And it never got to the shadow in the bathroom.
It looked like some weird found footage shit. It was strange. I told them both to delete the damn video. She wanted to send it to me for paranormal proof. I said fuck the proof.
I don’t care if anyone thinks I’m nuts or lying. I know what I know and that’s it. At the moment they asked me to do a smoke bowl (smudging) ceremony. The problem is I suspected one or all members of the family were behind the activity. Not faking it, but were feeding it somehow.
So while I did do it, and things did calm down, I couldn’t do it properly unless they all left. I explained in detail why that was. And El Douche, the husband, tried to accuse me of wanting to steal. or doing “weird things” which he wouldn’t elaborate what those things would be. I kinda wanted to be sarcastic.
But I kept my mouth shut. The girls and mother realized I was losing patience. And they politely told him to fuck off. Which he didn’t like. But he had no choice.
I started wondering if it was all coming from him. But I was told no right away by my guides.
“He’s too insignificant,” they told me. “He’s not the one behind this,”
So moving on.
They left me with a friend of the family they trusted. And he helped me do the ritual. I liked the guy. He was like a modern day hippy. And he was chill.
He also turned out to be the perfect attendant for my rituals. Very respectful and could be serious when he needed to be. I performed the smudging. And also used holy water and my rosary. Plus I did an exorcism in Latin. Well my own butchered Latin.
I speak Spanish so I pronounced the words as best as I could. The intent and the divine powers is what’s important. Plus knowing the meaning behind the words and having faith. I also did the Buddhist Atanatiya Protection ritual as well. Normally I do that and it goes away.
Even a normal smudging gets rid of what’s in a house. But that didn’t happen here. It was weakened. And irritated. But it did not leave.
So I told the mother on the phone that I needed to dig deeper into the activity. She asked me to sleep in the master bedroom. That it could be on the floor if I wasn’t comfortable sleeping on a stranger’s bed. But to take advantage of their absence to see things. So I made a make shift bed on the floor.
The guy asked me if I wanted his company. And I said,
” It depends. Your friend might want you to keep an eye on me. But in truth, I’m going to confront this thing. And they like to attack while you sleep. So I leave it to you. But you need to know what you’re getting into beforehand,”
He decided not to. Can’t say I blame him. It took me two hours before I finally fell asleep. But it was hard. There was an air of dread in that house.
I have walked cemeteries in the dead of night. And felt fine. The dead are my friends. And I never walk alone. Besides my guides, I ask the Gods and special spirits of the area to walk with me.
But this place had me jumpy. I hadn’t seen anything yet in the first few days. But I could feel that something was off. You know when you have that feeling of dread like something really bad is about to happen? It was weird. This entity made me feel like a child. It made me feel like it was scolding me.
Like I was going to get in trouble with my parents if I didn’t leave. I had to catch myself a few times. And realize I’m an adult. And this thing was messing with me. I’ve done nothing wrong to feel guilty or afraid.
But something was strange about those feelings. Is it possible one of the girls did something wrong? And one or more of the spirits were seeking vengeance? I filed that away in my notes. And the worst part was that fucking clock.
It was an old antique clock that they kept. And you could feel the arms of the clock make sharp movements. Loud movements. Something’s wrong with that thing, I thought. I made notes of that too.
Placed it under the heading of possible cursed or haunted object. Wasn’t sure what it was yet. And when I finally did fall asleep, it was some weird trippy shit. This third night that I was there, I dreamed I was in a garbage dump? Or maybe a Potter’s field. You know, one of those public graveyards for people that got abandoned.
Or who were too poor to afford a proper burial. There was this mass of flies. They were altogether and seemed to be one mass. And then I had the strange thought that they were. One entity with many bodies controlled by a singular intelligence.
I looked at it and said something weird like,
“Do you serve him?”
Remember this is the Dream world. I was trained by my medicine woman to have have some control. But there are things I know when I am asleep that I don’t know when I’m awake. And it replied no almost like a shriek. What I do remember, is that I had enough control in my dream to banish it.
I said,
” Spirit of darkness, in the name of the mystic, (can’t remember what I said ) I command thee to leave now and return to (can’t remember), “
The thing shrieked and flew away. And when I woke up, it was morning. The neighbor had made pancakes and bacon for us both.
“Dude I had the weirdest, trippiest dream,” he said, ” There were giant cockroaches from Hell flying in and out of the house,”
A lot of evil spirits take the form of vermin. That was my first experience in the first week. And I spent almost everyday banishing these fuckers in dreams and in waking life. I will explain the next week tomorow. If I have the energy.
These last few weeks have drained me. I slept the whole day when I got home. And then half a day, the day after that.
– M
Adventures of A Mage In Miami 