Besides being the time of Imbolc as well as the Roman purification rituals for February, we have a lot of astrological activity. We see the Green Comet at 9:45pm EST. There hasn’t been a Green Comet around here in 50,000 years. So make sure you perform your strongest rituals.
On this addition of random links of the day, we have some interesting articles on places and magic. And magical places in some cases. I kept getting so many of these articles that I made them into a random links addition. We’ll also be exploring ghosts and at least one article on haunted objects. Let’s get started!
It looks like the long winter goes on, as death continues to reap the living. After the intense period of the Super New Moon in Aquarius, we have all been left shook. New Moons are times of the dead and bad luck. But a Super New Moon is like Mother Nature was on her period and flushed all the nasty negative shit out. And you better watch out that you don’t get swept in it too. s
As mentioned this year we are in the sign of Otura Niko, the Foreman of Death. And this year is full of death in every which way. My friend just lost his other friend to a car accident. I had to perform a ritual to cross him over last night. And there is the incident of the dead woman who was attached to a statue I had gained.
The irony is that the signs of the spirits are all saying the same thing : drop your to-do lists, relax, be present. Don’t worry about the next thing to do. It’s kind of hard to do that when you have friends and family dying off. Or when you have to constantly watch your ass to make sure the sky isn’t falling. I have a headache.
But not a normal headache. It’s more like a spiritual headache. And I need a pill that lasts the whole year.
Tonight is Hekate’s Deipnon, and I figured I would write this. I was also asked to write this by a client who needed her home and personal space cleared of negative energies. After I took a heavy curse off of her. The following is a ritual I came up with from various practices. But I made this ritual neutral so that it can be used by any religion and any God.
The following is what you need.
1) Holy Water
3) Vessel to contain negative energy (an idol or sacrificial representation, even a bag filled with garbage or a bag of food will do)
4) Offerings for whatever spirit or God will get rid of the negativity.
Part 1 : Pharmakos
In Ancient Greece they used sacrificial animals, people, food, or even idols called Pharmakoi. The idea was that they were vessels that retained the bad energy. And that when you sacrificed them, you were killing the bad energy. So the first part of this is a Pharmakos cleansing. You’re trapping the bad energy into a vessel.
You have to map out where you are going to go. For instance you need to know every nook and cranny in your house. Every corner. If you have an attic, start there. And make sure you go to every spot in your property and home.
Ending in the basement as well as outside your prosperity. You have to pray, or chant, or do a spell. And you command all negative energy and bad spirits to be bound to the vessel. You do this while you are walking around. The vessel is a sacrifice that soaks up all of the bad energy around.
You also rub yourself, all members of the house (including pets) with the vessel. This is done so that any attachments or bad vibrations can be drained into the vessel. You’ll know it’s done because you will feel the property be instantly lighter. And you and those around you will feel lighter as well. If this was a bag of garbage, toss it into a public dumpster or community dumpster ASAP.
And say that no one will be harmed by this bag. That you consign the dark energy to its own dark world never to return. To be bound to chaos forever. Chaos meaning the primordial void. Then turn around and walk away without looking back.
If it was food, you need to go to a crossroads, railroad, or body of water, even a pond will do. And call upon the spirits of those places (in the name of your God/Goddess) to remove the bad spirits and energies. And that as the animals eat the food, they will not be in danger. That they will destroy the negativity. Again turn around and walk away.
Position your car so that you don’t have to turn around to face the spot when getting inside. You don’t want to look at the area even by accident. Make sure you can leave and leave fast without turning around. The reason for this is that all the negativity will go to you worse than before if you do. Or worse, you might see the spirits that are going to take away the bad energy.
Which can be dangerous by itself. Another possibility is you will see the bad spirits that you bound and they will be freed instantly to haunt you. Make sure you leave the proper offerings at the site for the spirits or God you called upon. Go home.
Part 2 : Casting Aspersions
The term “casting aspersions” comes from this. It’s a form of cleansing with holy water. You basically flick holy water on the walls. On the ground. On anything and on everyone even pets.
That’s what casting aspersions actually means. This is to bless everyone and everything the water touches. So with the water you blessed with your own prayers, bless the home. You will need an Aspersorium which is a fancy word for an object that you can use to flick the holy water with. The church uses fancy metal devices or even brushes or small buckets to do this.
But any object will do. You cast the aspersions from the outside in. From the front and back yard. Call on your God or Goddess and their spirits to protect and bless the property and dedicate it to them. Say,
“I dedicate this home to be your divine temple. This I holy ground and only that which you allow can enter,”
Bless the outside in. And enter the front door and bless the house from the basement all the way to every nook and cranny up into the attic. You should feel another wave of relief come upon you. Make sure you flick the water or asperse it everywhere.
Sometimes I even use the cap from the plastic bottle I keep my holy water to asperse everything. If all else fails just use your hand. You will feel the wave of relief hit and once that happens you will know the dedication ritual is done. Granted some people don’t choose to dedicate their houses to their Gods. Instead they just do normal blessings.
I’m just not one of those people. My house is a temple to the Gods. I want them to live there. Sure the upkeep is a little more stressful but ultimately it’s better.
Part 3 : Reclaim your Authority
With this part, walk around with a holy item that represents your faith after the cleansing.
And command that any unwelcome or negative spirits need to go. Command them to leave in the name of your God/Goddess/Gods. And say that only the Gods and their divine spirits can be in your home. Do this to reinforce and reassert your control over the home and property. It restored the natural barriers that exist to keep bad spirits out.
And it also re-empowers them to keep things out you don’t want.
Part 4 : Warding
This part is a long term project and it’s not something you can do in one day or night. You go through the process of learning special prayers. Or getting or making amulets to ward off negative energy. Or talismans to bring protective energy. Also drawing symbols or writing special words or letters of power is important.
You have to research your own religion. Or your culture and heritage. And find out what is useful in keeping bad influences away. This will increase the power of the dedication and/or blessing.
I started this first week in the New Year in mourning. I lost my Great Uncle and my neighbor who was a good friend all at once. I’m using Santero rites to cross him over. He was a fellow practitioner. So for me, the above image makes a lot of sense.
Because death and it’s energy has been with us this beginning of the year.
And I am ready for this shit to go. Despite the darkness, I’m still hopeful for this year. So with that said, here are the astrological links. Here we have all full moon dates and names for 2023.
Yes this is a year ruled by Obatala and Oshun (or by Exu and Oxum if you practice Quimbanda). But the sign of the year is what seems to truly be reigning this year. Already, it seems that the Ajogún are on the move bringing with them misfortune and death. Yesterday, my friend got into a car accident. A little while later, I learned that my great uncle had died suddenly.
Between yesterday and today, some of my magical charms for protection against death, started to become overwhelmed. I had to call on the spirits to reverse whatever it was that was sending death this way. And I had to cleanse, re-bless, and recharge all of my charms. And right now as I am writing this, I found out that my neighbor whom I always talked with, died from a heart attack recently. Either just before or after New Years.
I didn’t want to ask the date because that’s disrespectful and insensitive to his poor wife. But it was recent. So either just before or just after New Years. This year is not a good year. It’s not a year that we should all be cheering for.
It is the year of Otura Niko, the Foreman of the Dead.
Friends, things are only going to get worse from here. Before in 2020, COVID was the force used by the Ajogún to spread terror and disharmony. But this year they are mixing the tactics up. Now it’s more like a mix of 2020 with 2019. In 2019 it was more personalized attacks sent to different people.
Personal problems. And 2020 was a massive problem that struck us all. This seems to be a hybrid of both those years. It has all the force if not more, of 2020. But disseminated in ways that will effect us directly.
A friend of mine who has mixed white and native ancestry told me something recently. Now his magic is strong. He works with indigenous spirits. And when my ass has been in danger, he’s protected me. But he has this thing.
He says odd numbered years are bad luck.
And he had the feeling before I even knew it, that this year would be bad. And now here we are. But it gets worse. Last month a fellow blogger named Librarian of the Multiverse had also had a conversation with me. That she sensed that death would be coming this year as well.
In my head I was like, fuck because that’s really what we need now. Maybe it is. Because clearly humanity refuses to awaken from this walking coma we’re all in. I wonder if we have fallen so deeply asleep that the Ajogún have seen us as easy prey. That we’re being targeted now because they see us as dumb sheep that are easy to take out. But now I want to move on to something else.
The Divination (letter of the year) says to stay away from lakes and rivers and even rain water. A friend of mine who is a seer told me something that spooked me. You see, she had no idea what the letter of the year had said. I didn’t have the time to tell her. But she said that something is in the water.
That something is in the water that’s going to kill people this year. No, she’s not a nut job. No, she doesn’t normally say stuff like that. For the very first time in my life, I understood the true meaning of the term “my blood ran cold”. Because I felt ice in my veins hearing her say that.
I feel a rising death wave like in 2020. But this one is worse. Part of me feels like I’m on a roller coaster. I want off of and I am screaming my head off into the void. But no matter what no one is going to save me.
So with that said, I think I am going to give you all a simplified version of the Ebbos or karmic cleansings for this year. Along with some additional advice that may come in handy.
The Ebbos given for this year include animal sacrifices. Which I am against. But I also understand traditions and what not.
I am no one to judge my people and how they follow the ways of the ancestors. I just don’t like or agree with all the ways of our ancestors. I don’t always follow those ways. I actually considered saying nothing for fear of being rebuked by other Santeros saying I am “exploiting our religion”.
Or some other horseshit that the zealots in my faith come up with to silence dissent.
My spirits and my Orisha do not care about whether or not I kill an animal. They accept fruits and vegetable offerings. But they also accept cooked animals. In other words, instead of giving them an animal that is being sacrificed and discarded I give them food. If the Ebbo asks for a roaster, I go out and find a cooked roaster.
It’s not impossible to find. There are some animals that are sacrificed in Africa that don’t exist here. So with divination and research I find what they would accept and grant them that dinner. In places that are sacred to them. I also add the fruits and vegetables anyway as an added offering.
If blood is what they want that isn’t a problem either. There are butcher shops that are willing to grant the meat and the blood. As long as they get paid they don’t care. Again, this is how I do it because my Gods and spirits allow me to. Because my Orisha allows me to.
Do a divination, meditate, and find what works for you. And if any Santeros out there have an issue with how I approach our faith, I don’t care. It has served me well up until now. And until they (the Orishas) or my spirits tell me otherwise I will continue. I am accountable to them, not to you.
Now the offerings in IFA, you can skip because that’s for the order of IFA. The practitioners of IFA divination and magic under Orula. I am going to give you a simplified version of the regular Santero offering. A medium rooster and seven colored strips.
The seven colored strips symbolize the Seven African powers. The other ingredients are only for Santeros. So this simplified version is to ask the Seven African Powers for help. Tie them into different parts of the house. Such as door knobs and in windows to ward off death.
In fact consider making a bracelet of these seven strips for yourself. As an amulet. The cooked roaster is the sacrifice that will empower the charms. They will work against death. Which will be very important because there is an article I wrote which is about charms against death.
In addition to that :
– Honey for Oshun, Brandy for Eshu, Incense or anything holy for Obatala because he’s the King of Heaven. And because Santeria is mixed with Catholicism, Christian things like blessed white candles or incense for him will do.
– And you could get another roasted chicken for Orula, his wife Odu, and the spirits of IFA and ask for their blessings and protections. If you approach them with respect, they won’t care what faith you belong to.
Leave these offerings at a crossroads with three pennies for Elegua so that he will send the offerings to the Orishas. Also this is very important, to a point even more important than the offerings mentioned before.
Offerings for the dead
You need to use any form of protection the dead can give you. Sacrifice to your ancestors. Light candles and incense to them, give them Hades Money, etc… don’t be stingy. And if you don’t already have an ancestor shrine to them, now is the time to make it happen. Because our primary protection comes from the dead.
And also our non human spiritual guides such as Angels, Nature Spirits, etc..we need all of their protections. So when you have a chance give offerings at a cemetery to Oya.
– Nine Purple Grapes
– 9 Red Roses
– Nine Pennies
– A Bottle of Red Wine
For her and for all the dead. You don’t have to enter the cemetery. Oya brings the dead to the front gates. Leave the offerings there and she will share it with the dead. Ask them and her for protection and blessing.
And for mass purification in all its forms. And dedicate that entire cemetery to her and the Gods of the Dead. You should feel different. As if something negative left your body when you pray to her. When you are done, leave a candy offering to Elegua in his Eshu form.
And ask him to send these offerings to Oya and the dead. And then leave without looking back.
Now it’s important to also work within your own religion. If you don’t believe in Santeria but want protection, research these Deities and find someone in your own religion who matches them. For instance, if you’re Christian, the Archangel Gabriel is the Messenger of God (Elegua is the Messenger of the Gods) and he’s one of the Angels of Death.
So he’s perfect for this. And instead of a crossroads or all these offerings, you make a massive donation to your church for him in Jesus name. And Jesus died and rose again. So any offering to him works. And he’s the intercessor between humanity and God which makes him a messenger as well.
Any offering you give to him, give with an open heart and perfect love. If you’re Hindu, do this with Ganesha. And look up who the God of the Dead is. One you are comfortable with and work with them instead. If you are Celtic, work with Morrigan.
She hangs out at the crossroads and she’s associated with the dead. There’s so many options out there. Protect yourself well. But most importantly of all is this.
– Personal offerings to your spirit guides
Whoever your guide is. A God. An Angel. A Faerie. A Ghost. As well as all of your ancestors.
Whoever it is, divine with them and ask what they want and keep giving it to them all year long. By feeding your spirit guide, you are keeping yourself safe. And sacrifice to your loved ones Spirit guides as well. Even do it for your pets. I am.
Finally, I leave you with this. These were special warding rituals I did when the pandemic hit. They kept me and my family safe at the height of the pandemic. We survived 2020 without getting the disease. Even though my Mom is a healthcare worker and she had to enter places that weren’t safe.
Meanwhile people around us were dropping dead. Even those who were supposed to be safe. This protected us. So please, read this old blog carefully. And adapt the rituals for what’s happening now.
Just like on that blog I will keep you updated on events with updates here. Do offerings to all those spirits and Gods. And make the same kinds of charms. Do the same things I did back then. Just adapt them to whatever fresh hell we are going to suffer this year.
Well, we are finally at the last day of the Noumenia. The day when we finish the festival. This one is an odd mix of the first two. It’s a semi stay at home festival. It focuses on non human as well as human spirits.
Our Agathos Daimoi (Good Spirits) or spirit guides. Those spirits who have watched over us since the days of our birth. In ancient times they were honored with huge feasts in the household. The family would gather round. Like Christmas it was a family celebration.
Usually everyone in the family participated in thanking and honoring their Daimoi. Followers of the Theoi and Theia are still here. And so, modern temples who worship the Gods come together in temple celebrations to honor their good spirits. In my case and in the case of many other people, I do it alone. I do have a temple, but we don’t always celebrate the Noumenia together.
And they use the modern calculation of the New Moon. The timing I use was revealed to me. And it took me a long time just to study. So I choose to do it my reconstructed way.
We begin our celebration as always at sunset, marking the next day. We set up a shrine to our Agathos Daimoi. Now my shrine is personal to me and so I can’t snap a picture of it. But what they have are typically images of protective spirits. This also includes our ancestors because they are also our Agathos Daimoi.
Now they don’t have to be Greek spirit guides. Any spirit guide is an Agathos Daimoi no matter what culture they come from. I personally have native and African guides among many others. And their images adorn my shrine. Now the images can be anything.
If you have plant spirit guides, place potted plants or images of those plants at the shrine. If you have guides who are ancestors, place their pictures there. If your guide is a guardian Angel then place a warrior Angel statue in the shrine. If you are protected by a specific Saint or Demi God also place an image of them there. There is no wrong or right way to do this.
I use to have this book shelf dedicated just to them. I placed all my guides images there. An old associate of mine who practices Voodoo and Hoodoo managed to get her hands on a bakery rack. And she uses it for all of her guides to have a place in her room. Now, on to the God of this festival.
Agathos Daimon as a God of luck
Agathos Daimon meaning “Good Spirit” can also mean “Good God”. There’s a lot of debate over this. But essentially Agathos Daimon is a spirit guide. But also the name of a God of good luck and prosperity who appears as a giant snake. It’s said he’s the husband of Tyche (Lady Luck).
There are some who claim this is a title for Zeus (who does appear as a giant snake sometimes). We know that Agathos Daimon is the name for a spirit guide. But whether or not there is a God or group of Gods who share that name depends on your view.
Now, this is my personal experience. This is not to be taken as “gospel”. This was a personal gnosis granted to me. I do not claim to be all knowing. But I did see him in a vision.
It was in an exhaust trance.
It kind of freaked me out because it looked so real. Imagine having a giant talking snake with semi human-like features in your bedroom. I damn near shit myself. He is not the serpentine form of Zeus. Though he did say Zeus has a similar avatar.
But he did tell me that he was a God of good luck and did confirm Tyche was his wife. He also told me he was the Lord of all Agathos Daimoi. In other words, he’s the God and chief of all spirit guides in Greek culture. This is what he told me. I did notice that after I began giving him cultus, my guides got stronger.
No matter what culture they come from. He does bring good luck. In fact sometimes when I pray to him I see visions of golden coins falling from the skies. And in any working with Tyche, he amplifies her gifts to immense levels. I have contemplated buying an image of a golden serpent for him.
He gives good luck by causing you to “shed” your bad luck. Like a snake shedding skin. Sometimes it’s a painful process. Emotionally, mentally, and spiritually painful. But when he’s done, anything that was holding you back is removed.
And prosperity trickles in.
Besides Agathos Daimon, there are also the ancient heroes. You have probably heard of the term “hero worship”. Well that is because the heroes of the ancient Greeks are like our version of the Saints. In fact, the cult of the Saints was basically ripped off of our hero cults. We honor the Heroes for their intercession in our affairs.
People are used to asking the Gods for favors all of the time. However, the Gods are cosmic beings and are thus busy most of the time. The heroes on the other hand, were human once. And they are members of “The Mighty Dead”. The most powerful of the dead who can grant any boon.
It should be noted that at least some of these heroes are Demi Gods. Or became Gods after death. So hero worship is sometimes literally worship. So we have the added benefit of God power with hero power. Best of both worlds.
And I can also tell you that they are great to call in battle against dark entities. The heroes understand humanity on a level the Gods don’t. And they’re closer to us because the underworld is beneath the earth itself. In another, more spiritual dimension. Even Gods of the dead aren’t so close because they occupy higher space.
First, we give offerings to Hestia. Rather than the libations, I like to use candles this time. Fire is sacred to Hestia anyways. But yesterday I used libations. I wash my hands in the Lustral Waters and I speak the words,
“Hestia, Daughter of the Most High God, Zeus the God of Gods. Hestia of the golden hair from which fiery oil ever drips, ancient keeper of the ways of the Gods, protectress of the family and the house of the family. Keeper of the Hearthe on which our ancestors once cooked their meals, and families gathered round to celebrate and eat meals, while priests and priestesses gathered round it to perform rituals, we ask for your holy intercession on our behalf great lady, O Princess of the Olympioi, grant to us your favor and grace so that we may continue our work and begin the rituals of Agathos Daimon, Yammas,”
I usually wait for a sign from Hestia. A feeling of grace to overcome me, which tells me she’s here. Allowing me to continue on, now spurred by her spirit. Now I bring either wine for libations, or food. Home cooked food.
Whatever you are eating is what you should offer.
I bring part of my dinner to them. I have two shrines for them. One on the outside and one in home. Back when I didn’t have the time, space, or money to give my offerings, I used to leave it outside. I asked Agathos Daimon for a sign of where I should leave the offerings.
The next day my mother told me that she saw a huge snake by this tree on the left hand side of our apartment. I took it as a sign and went there. I felt the power of that tree. A hidden power. I must have walked by that tree a dozen times.
And never had I bothered paying attention to it. Now I looked inside it not with eyes, but with heart. And I felt it’s hidden power. It was damn near invisible. But there.
I guess I wasn’t ready to know about it yet.
And then for the first time I noticed something I never noticed before. The roots of this particular tree looked like giant snakes. I took that as my second sign. I opened myself to my spirits and asked if this was the place and they said yes. From that day forward, it was my shrine to Agathos Daimon and to my personal Daimoi.
Today I had a simple food. It was just pasta and eggs and bread. But it was all that I had to give. After lighting the candle for Hestia, I ate dinner with my mother. And I separated a portion of the food into a bag. I prayed to the spirits who worship the Gods to charge it with prayers for them.
Then when I finished eating, I blessed it in the name of the Gods. They could eat the psychic energy. I went to the shrine. I prayed to Agathos Daimon and my Daimoi first.
“My Lord, Agathos Daimon, please shed from me all all that is impure. Cleanse my life and that of my loved ones of things we no longer need or want. And bring to us prosperity. As I honor you I also honor my Agathos Daimoi, my good spirits that you have granted me. And those whom are empowered by you even if they come from other lands.
I pray to you my holy Daemons, great spirits granted to me by the Gods for my own blessings and protections. I thank you for all the good things you given me and my family. I thank you for always being my support in the darkest of times. May Agathos Daimon bless you my Agathos Daimoi. Continue to walk with me on the path, Yammas,”
I drop a portion of the food for both him and also my guardians. Next, the heroes. I name a bunch of heroes from Greek religion, and also from other cultures that I look up to. Then I say something like this,
“Holy Ones, great heroes of old, I pray, please support us in our work. Please empower my Daimoi and grant them victory in everything that they do. And grant me victory and focus, please aid me in (give your petition here) please grant me your support. I ask that you intercede with our Gods. And that you also intercede personally for us in all of our affairs. And especially in the petition for which I have dedicated to you. Yammas,”
I dropped the rest of the food there. I went back to my home. And there I made candle and incense offerings for Agathos Daimon, my Daimoi (on my ancestor shrine), and the Heroes. I paid homage to my spirits and when I was finished, I burned a final candle to Hestia. And this time I took a reading from my temple for her.
And with that, the feast of Agathos Daimon is over now. This can be a private holiday. Or you can invite a close circle of friends to honor their own patrons and spirits. Like I said, it’s a mix of the Deipnon along with the actual Noumenia feast. Good night everyone.
The beach is already legendary among us Floridians. The official name is Chastain Beach. It’s on Hutchinson Island. But most people call it Seven Skulls because once seven human skulls were found there. Every time a Hurricane hits that area in just the right direction, skeletal remains are always discovered.
It’s led to many believing this is an indigenous burial ground. As you can read from the article on it, it’s also believed to be a mystical place. People who live in the town of Stuart say that the bones should be buried again. That interfering with the bodies is bad. Unfortunately the authorities don’t listen.
They were removed from the beach already. Probably on their way to a Museum.
Recently I had talked about a strange Supernatural occurrence during Hurricane Ian. In which I believe a Wild Hunt was unleashed. Some people in Central Florida heard the hooves of Horses on their roofs during the Hurricane. Something none of us have ever reported hearing before. I tried debunking it.
And couldn’t. So I turned to magic. And I saw a horrifying visions. They looked like legions of angry souls. All of them seeking revenge in one form of another.
This video show it from the beginning. The Seminole Nation has claimed the bodies and the beach as belonging to their ancestors. I just thought this was something odd and interesting to put here. Be blessed my friends,
Hello everyone! Celebrating the Catholic Feast of All Hallows’ Eve as we approach All Hallowsmastide. November is the time of the holy souls in Purgatory. Remember that the Real Samhain isn’t until two weeks from now in November (you can thank the Gregorian calendar for that). So this is a Catholicised version of the holiday. So we are in the Catholic feast.
Not Samhain. I made a special post for links to everything from articles to Creepy pastas on YouTube and more! Enjoy!
For those who don’t know, we had a combination of a New Moon, with a solar eclipse in Scorpio last Sunday. It lasted until Wednesday. Wednesday was when the solar eclipse happened. New Moons naturally belong to the dead and to dark spirits. And so are Solar Eclipses.
The Sun Gods enter their chthonic aspecks as Gods of the dead. This is the perfect time for the removal of negative energy. Or sending it out. I call these dark cleansings because we are working with dark energy to take the bad energy away. Like the Bloodmoon, a Scorpio based Eclipse (and really eclipses in general) force you to face that which you fear the most.
They force you to confront problems and burdens you’ve been holding onto for a long time. They also end a chapter of your life to start another. In my case, I had a very personal journey to make.
Dealing with the Sins of the Past
I got into an argument with someone from my past. And this person reminded me of a time when I wasn’t so spiritual. And in fact I didn’t care who I hurt as long as I got mine. Even people who loved me. And who I should have loved back.
When I was younger, and far more foolish, I was a misogynist. I didn’t think I was a misogynist back then. In fact I thought I was a feminist. What I was, was one of those wanna be “woke” assholes thinking I believed in equality. It wasn’t all fake.
I truly believed I was a feminist. Part of the reason I turned against Christianity was due to the way most churches treat women. Especially my church. I was raised to believe that men are above women by divine right. Or some other horseshit like that.
Because Adam was born before Eve etc.. even though the original Hebrew Bible says that Lilith was created at the same time as Adam. And she was his equal in all respects. I was a womanizer. A compulsive liar. I constantly cheated, and I didn’t fully understand that I was controlling.
I learned this abusive behavior mostly from my dad. But also from the church, and the culture of toxic masculinity that pervades the West. And even when the person I was with was a genuinely good person, I couldn’t be faithful. Sometimes when I cheated I convinced myself that I was “loyal” and that this other person was just a side person. Someone to satisfy me when my regular partner wasn’t around.
I look back on that now and feel disgusted with myself. I wasn’t the best big brother growing up either. I was a teenager and I was so caught up in my own bullshit that I didn’t see that my sister needed me. And my Mother and Paternal grandmother were at odds with me as well. For different reasons.
How could this have ever been me? I’m 36 years old now. Not some young, cocky, asshole. After opening my eyes to several truths, I began to change. To remold myself and cast aside the bad things in my heart and mind. To become a better person.
After becoming a Pagan and a Magician that quest took off to even greater levels. I learned about the Mother Goddesses. I formed an especially close link to Hera, Nemesis, Demeter, and Gaia to name just a few. To Inle and Oshun, and to Chang’e and Kwan Yin. I learned I had a lot of work to do.
And they had no issue kicking my ass from left to right in my mid 20’s to get me to learn. My relationship with my mother and grandmother was better. I made amends with my sister eventually. And I am still changing. Still learning.
But I no longer cheat, no longer lie, no longer think I am some big “woke” feminist ally. I pursue the goal of just being a good and decent person. When I can achieve that, truly achieve it, then maybe I can be called a feminist. Until then I feel that it’s an empty title. The Cuban Exiles tend to be homophobic.
Tend to be womanizers and liars. This isn’t me hating my own culture. I’m just being honest. For years I had decided to turn my back on all religion and spirituality. I went headlong into hedonism.
And I stopped caring about people. Which led to a lot of heart ache both for myself and the girls I dated in my youth. After the nasty experience I had last Saturday, I realized I was deluding myself. I had a reading done by a friend of mine in Utah. And she told me that until I apologize to the women I have hurt, I haven’t made any amends.
Little did I know, that all of this was playing out for a reason. Because Scorpio’s influence on the New Moon and the Solar Eclipse was moving karma around. This has been a burden on my soul for a very long time. And I had kept it deep within myself. I buried this part of my past because I didn’t want to admit I had ever been this ignorant.
I began calling up women from my past and apologizing. I sent more than a dozen emails. I even wrote letters by snail mail. Some didn’t care anymore. Others forgave me.
Some said they don’t know if they can forgive me, but my apologies gave them closure. And others I am still waiting to hear from via the letters. I had begone to make amends. I was ready to begin the dark cleansing with Scorpio.
I had to draw on my training to figure out how to perform this cleansing. A cleansing that would be strong enough to do this. To channel the power of the Scorpio fueled new moon and solar eclipse. I decided to do a burnt offering. Thing is, I have no intentions of ever hurting an animal.
The Pharmakos is the human version of a scapegoat. Humans would be chosen (or sometimes volunteer) to represent all the bad energy in a town or city. And then they would be thrown off a cliff after having weights of some sort attached. I know this is just an over simplification. So I linked an article from Harvard on this practice.
With the death of the Pharmakos, the bad energy was killed as well. In modern times, we use dolls or some other idol to be our Pharmakos in Greek expiation rituals. So I decided to incorporate the burnt offering practice with a Pharmakos.
My spirits reminded me of the power of burning magical papers and petitions to get things done. So I took a piece of Bible paper from my old catechism Bible. I collect Bible paper. It’s an old Bible so the pages started falling apart little by little. I mostly use them as paper talismans.
I drew the Triangle of Solomon on it. Now this is normally used for conjuring, trapping, and controlling a demon. The triangle protects the conjuring sorcerer. And the circle forces the entity inside and binds them. I summoned the sinful and bad parts of my soul into the circle.
And the triangle was keeping me safe so that as it burned, the bad energy couldn’t return or spread to anyone. I didn’t film it or take a picture. The last thing I needed was an image captured of negative energy burning. The paper was only beginning to be blessed by the Hearth in those images. So those images are safe.
I performed a technique in Yoruba religion called Sarayeye. This means you ceremonially use a spiritually charged item like an idol, herbs or flowers, food offering, stones or sticks, etc.. to absorb all the bad energy from your body. You take the chosen object and rub it from the crown of your head to the soles of your feet. And you say words of power calling upon all bad things to leave your body. This can be anything, including bad luck and disease.
“May any harm or thing that causes harm, be displaced from my body and soul and bound into this offering,”
– Simple charm taught to me by an Elder in Santeria
In this case I did an hour long prayer. I poured my heart and soul into it. I even started shaking and crying at some point. Broke out into a cold sweat as if I had a fever. I felt nauseous.
The Gods spoke in divination later and told me I had “shed my sinful soul,”. As if I had separated from an evil twin. When the last of my wicked soul had left my body (well, as much as a normal human can shed) my body slowly went back to normal. I finished 10 mins before sunset. And I took the paper and burned it outside on a crossroads.
The smell of Bible paper was sweet. It almost smelled like Palo Santo to me. When the paper burned I felt a strange sort of relief. And the feeling of something that broke in me. And I felt what can only be described as spiritual pus leave my body.
The next day, I felt like shit. I was sore all over my body as if I had lifted a thousand pound truck. The holy fire of the hearth match and the paper’s own inherent holiness channeling the celestial fire. It felt as if the holy flames had burned what was evil inside me. This isn’t a magic bullet that makes my old selfish ways okay.
But it’s a starting point towards the path of redemption I hope. I also prayed to Zeus Meilichios for purification. Confessing my sins before his idol, and allowing him to take as much miasma away as possible. It’s a harder process than I thought. Each time it’s harder to talk to someone I hurt.
I wish the universe could have given me a warning ahead of time.
Karmic Structures and their destruction
After I had performed the ritual, I prayed to the Laughing Buddha. He’s always been a Buddha who has walked with me. A Patron and protector. I asked forgiveness for what I had done years before. And to find a way to be redeemed. I spoke to him out loud about everything.
An then I stopped suddenly. Suddenly I felt this disturbance. Like a rock thrown into water. And I felt him in my heart. Almost like having a conversation but without words.
He told me that my rituals and my attempt at amends weren’t enough. I needed more.
The Journey of Jetsun Milarepa
The story of Milarepa is a really messed up one. It starts like this. He came from a wealthy family. But when his father died, his aunt and uncle who were very greedy, stole all the property. As well as the money and left him and his mother nothing.
So his mother sent him away to learn the black arts.
When he returned as a powerful dark magus, his aunt and uncle were throwing a party. Their son was about to get married. And many people had come to attend to feast. He used his power to summon a giant Scorpion monster to raise the house. And 35 people died.
The aunt and uncle lived however. When the villagers came to kill him, he summoned a hailstorm that destroyed their crops. Which forced them all to back down. After years of wandering the land as a black magician, his heart grew heavy. He began to hate himself.
And to regret his past sins. He decided to learn new ways. And he found a Lama or “chief”. This is the Buddhist version of a Guru in Hinduism. It’s a teacher of the Dharma.
His Master would be Marpa the Translator. One of the greatest Buddhist masters of all time. Marpa was a hard Master to serve. The guy made him go through hell in order to prove himself worthy. I’ll spare you the long history lesson.
But he ordered Milarepa to build three towers and then destroy them. He later told Milarepa the reason for this. Each tower represented all of the bad karma and suffering he sent out into the world. The task had to be difficult because it was a sort of penance. Each time a tower was constructed, it was instantly imbued with all the bad spiritual energy.
And when it was destroyed, the karma was destroyed. That’s what the laughing Buddha told me to do. I have to create a karmic structure to destroy. In penance for my old ways. It was revealed to me by him what I had to do.
And how many times I had to do it. That part of my ceremony I won’t talk about. It’s just for me to know. I started on that already. And hopefully I can continue to make amends.
What I can say however is that it’s not a large structure. And it isn’t as many times as Milarepa. While my past self may not have been too enlightened, I never summoned a giant scorpion to kill people. Here’s hoping I can continue my path towards making amends.